By Arica Quinn, Murfreesboro SitiGirl Luminary
May is Mental Health Awareness Month, and I’m raising my voice to say this loud and clear: Sis, it’s time to take a major pause.
Not a soft whisper of rest. Not a moment when everyone else is taken care of. I’m talking about a real timeout—a sacred, unapologetic pause to check in with YOU.
As women, especially Black women, we’re conditioned to push through, smile through, hold it down, and hold everyone up—even when we’re falling apart inside. But hear me: there is no crown in martyrdom when it comes at the cost of your mind, body, or soul.
It is not just OK to be selfish with your care—it’s absolutely necessary. You can’t pour from an empty cup, and you were never created to be anyone’s everything while being nothing to yourself.
So what does that pause look like?
Let’s get creative. Because caring for your mental health doesn’t always mean therapy appointments (though those are powerful and important too). Sometimes, it’s the small, soulful pauses that shift everything:
- Create a “Do Not Disturb” Ritual. One hour a week where your phone is on silent, your door is closed, and your spirit is open. Journal, nap, dance, cry, pray—whatever you need.
- Take a Solo Date. Go to that movie, that museum, or that cozy coffee shop. Dress up just for you. Take up space.
- Start a “Peace Playlist.” Fill it with songs that restore you, uplift you, or help you release what you’ve been carrying.
- Say NO Without Explanation. That’s a full sentence. Reclaim your time and energy. You don’t owe anyone access to you when you’re in healing mode.
- Build a Joy Jar. Write down little joys and self-wins daily. On low days, pull from it and remember who you are.
Remember, sis, your mental health matters—not after the work is done, not after the kids are grown, not after the bills are paid. Right now. In the midst of it all.
Let me leave you with these affirmations. Speak them. Believe them. Let them sink deep into your spirit:
🌸 I am worthy of rest, even when the world is moving.
🌸 My peace is non-negotiable.
🌸 It is not selfish to put myself first—it is survival.
🌸 I release the pressure to be perfect and embrace the beauty of being present.
🌸 I am healing, I am whole, and I am enough.
You deserve more than survival, Queen. You deserve to thrive. So this May—and every month after—take the pause, make the time, and prioritize your whole self.With love and light,
Arica Quinn
Murfreesboro SitiGirl Luminary
Miss Middle Tennessee 2025
Miss Tennessee for America Strong People’s Choice 2024
